


Knives and Pens

by Just_A_Simple_Writer



Category: Death Note & Related Fandoms, Death Note (Anime & Manga)
Genre: AU, Angst, Blood, M/M, lots of blood, this is not a happy fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-02
Updated: 2018-03-02
Packaged: 2019-03-26 00:34:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 802
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13846329
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Just_A_Simple_Writer/pseuds/Just_A_Simple_Writer
Summary: Even in a universe without a Death Note, nothing really changes. Some things are set in stone.





	Knives and Pens

He straightens up and the blood drips from his lips as he smiles, the shark's smile that sends chills down your back and that you can't quite drag your eyes from. You barely spare a glance for the girl laying on the floor, her life dripping from his fingers and lips onto the floor in red rivers that shine in the haunting moonlight. His eyes reflect it and he is so cold, not the same boy who you were laughing with what seemed like a lifetime ago.

He takes a step towards you and you move backwards, not even meaning to, but he is terrible and deadly, and you want to run from the dark alley and hide beneath your covers as you did as a child, when you feared monsters. He has become a monster now. Or perhaps he always was. You always thought yourself above these things. Fear. Love. Thought you were too smart for them. And then he came along and skewed your worldview. He had that effect on you.

His smile widens, and his teeth are stained, and you shudder.

He speaks, then, and even his voice is not his own.

"You fear me."

It isn't a question, but you nod anyway, and it occurs to you that this is who he is, and the version of him you knew, the one who sat up night after night with you, the one who laughed and bought you sweets, that boy never really existed, and you find yourself terribly sad.

He closes his eyes, and you know that he's revelling in your fear.

"I never cared about you" he continues, and although it appears that his eyes are closed, you know that he's watching you, gauging your reaction. Your eyes fill with tears, and you blink them away, desperate not to give him any more power over you.

"You're lying" you say, although you don't believe it yourself, you haven't since you saw him bending over the girl and covered in her blood and understood. He knows you're lying. Of course he knows.

He opens his eyes completely and you shrink back, scared by the lack of emotion in them.

"Am I?"

You nod but the tears return. You hope he hasn't seen them, but his smile widens and you know he has. He takes a step closer and this time you don't move away. He raises a hand to your chin and tilts your head up so you're forced to meet his eyes. You shudder at the sensation of blood against your skin but you're powerless to stop him.

He moves closer and speaks again.

"You mean nothing. I will barely remember killing you"

You close your eyes to try and stop the tears from falling but this time you fail and they pour down your cheeks in hot rivulets. He laughs and you can feel his breath against your skin. You shiver and you can tell he loves it, loves your fear, loves that it's _him_ you fear, and you wonder how you ever though he could have cared for you.

You open your eyes and force yourself to look at him, and he smiles, and it's cruel and you know what he's going to say even before he opens his mouth. But when he finally does say it it's more painful than you thought it would be.

"You loved me. You still love me."

You could deny it, but in the end, it would do you no good, so you just stay silent. He knows he's won, knows he's broken you, but he always did take things further than he had to, so he leans closer and kisses you softly, more softly than you'd thought he would, and you can't help kissing him back, despite the fact he tastes metallic, and you can feel the blood on his lips, and you know that he's going to kill you. When he finally pulls away there's a knife in his hand. You could scream, could try to run, maybe try to call someone, one of your colleagues, but he'll catch you eventually, and so you just close your eyes and don't move, not when you feel him softly touch the knife to your neck, not when it bites in, and your blood spurts out and splatters his face, not as you feel yourself slipping away. Before your breathing stops, you open your eyes and look at him, coated in your blood and the blood of the nameless girl, perhaps hoping to see sorrow or remorse in his eyes, but there's nothing, nothing but a sort of happiness and a look that suggests he's barely even thinking about you anymore. He whispers something in your ear as you slump in his arms, but you can no longer hear him.

**Author's Note:**

> I have a [tumblr](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/JaysWorlds)


End file.
